I don't really see the psychological attraction you're referring to either, tbh; it mainly strikes me as a form of self-indulgent sadism one can only engage in when the war is a highly abstracted team sport being viewed from the comfort of an armchair in another part of the world.

The average Ukrainian soldier is a prole who is drafted into the war and doesn't want to be there. You might think they hold reactionary opinions (and many of them undoubtedly do), but that's no basis for any ethically or politically coherent position when it comes to how to deal with the issue. It's the obligation of communists to educate their fellow working class members in order to deal with those reactionary tendencies.

This of course doesn't apply as much to the openly and explicity fascist and neonazi presences in the Ukrainian military and the fascist and oligarchic forces controlling the state. They don't really deserve much time or mercy.