I found it funny that I've been tinkering with mods and settings, unsuccessfully trying to get the game to run at all on Windows, but then it started up right away on Epic Games Store through Lutris. Now I just gotta figure out how to cap the frame rate. e: found an fps limiter on nexus mods, now everything works perfectly!

Previously I had a similar experience where Far Cry 1 wouldn't run on any Windows newer than XP, but worked perfectly on Linux.