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Reminds me of this story which I still regularly quote:
https://web.archive.org/web/20240627233128/https://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/l-p-d-libertarian-police-department
Oh yeah that one's great. I remember running into a bunch more like it somewhere, but no clue where or by who.
The beginning of that story is just 🤌
I was shooting heroin and reading “The Fountainhead” in the front seat of my privately owned police cruiser when a call came in. I put a quarter in the radio to activate it.