When a woman turns 30, she enters a chrysalis to begin her metamorphosis from "teen" to "milf".
It's wild how they basically turn into goop and reform entirely, but will somehow still retain memories from their teen years. Like if you get a teenager to associate electric shocks to a certain smell, even when they become a milf they still associate that smell with pain. Crazy!
Female adult film stars hit a point after about 25 where they're too old for teen stuff but too young for milf and its harder for them to find work
Seriously pretty much every woman I know had several glo-ups over the course of their thirties it was wild.
I don't get older. I just get hotter every year. I'm projecting that by 80, I will be the hottest woman to have ever lived
Here's hoping you also gain the power to drain the life from fascists with a single touch
People hit "old" at different times. Tim Rogers had an anecdote in one of his video reviews where he was talking about his two co-workers at Sony Entertainment Japan that were around the same age - one was cool AF and doing gigs in a jazz fusion band and the other was a boomer.
I gotta say that having a kid definitely speeds up the aging process a bit. All that extra responsibility tacked on at once is some "weeks where decades happen" shit lol.
I've lived through so many weeks where decades happen that I'm now approximately 240 years old
I'm in this weird limbo where my whole body aches but I still get carded buying alcohol
I have a full beard and definitely "look" my physical age. Maybe a bit younger because I never went bald, but still, I'm in my mid 30s so even if I appear 25 or 30 I shouldn't get carded. My understanding is a lot of those workers just card for alcohol nearly 100% if someone even look vaguely young at all. Like if you don't have a gray beard and your face skin sagging to your chest, you're getting carded.
My dad was bald around that age (from pics I've seen).
My brother and I have intact hairlines into our mid-30s. My dad used to get pissed when I'd call him bald and say something like "yeah, whatever, you'll be joining me soon enough." My brother and I also independently sort of just let our hair grow out.
I've always been a disappointment to my dad.
I’m a not at all secret third thing
Middle aged
(I’m 40)
Middle aged includes many boomers. The earliest Boomers are just starting to get “elderly”, if you’re going off of 70 ish. It’s all arbitrary anyway but just thought I’d point it out. The middle is by far the biggest part for everyone that dies of old age
Oldness can come in big lurches. I suddenly went from being carded for alcohol every time to maybe 2 times a year. During the last 20 months I added 1:30 to my mile time, my cognitive activities decreased significantly, I lost a 3" patch of hair off the top of my head and the rest thinned 75%. I have to stop myself from telling my adult kid to make sure they're getting regular sleep whenever they tell me they've been up late studying. I haven't been asked by a stranger if I have any weed for several years.
Age is just a number until you look up a condition you have and the internet is all "primarily affects middle-aged . . ." and that's when you become old. That and realizing that they're playing "Complicated" at the grocery store because you're the target demographic and it's on the oldies station meant for you and will stay there for as long as stores can play music at people.
At 25 I feel much younger than at 21. I kinda don't even know what happened 22-24. I remember being very early in my 20s and thinking on how long it will be till I'm mid 20s and it felt like a couple of days ago, and now I'm 25. My time perception is very weird and has always been though. Sometimes a week feels like a year. I never know what day of the week or date it is unless forced to, and then I quickly forget. If I was allowed to work 6 hours a day, my time perception would be much slower. I'm losing my life to work. :(
Man I don’t, but I am a lot more grounded. Honestly the diminishing sex drive has felt like an absolute boon and I wish I had just opted to go on a ton of antidepressants early bc I feel so much more clear headed about relationships than I did before.
The back pain jokes crack me up bc I tweaked my back as a teen in track and it’s never been the same so I don’t relate so much… it’s just always been there
based post
death to the Internet
death to social media
Death to America
Death to the young
Death to the old
Live in the pod eat bug and breathe mold!
lmao look at this old mf
谢谢
Did you try to simply stop making The Expression?
