I want to state up first I get it, I'm on the right side, most of these men are awful, and every man-o-sphere influence is awful. Andrew Tate belongs in a 6 foot deep hole, or a hole in the back of his head. Joe Rogan should be sent to the Hague.

But when dudes complain, even about genuine issues, we have a tendency to just attack them for it. If a guy complains that being short can kinda suck (and it can. More so than just getting girls, it can hurt your career and everything.) People, even leftists, tend to just call them a sad manlet or something. Same thing with dudes complaining they can't get a girlfriend, are they not alienated under capitalism? I'm not saying we have to coddle the incels, but we could do better at presenting a future, a better one, maybe?

The discourse about height, and dick size, are both stupid but here (in this safe space) can I admit that there's a point to both? They affect people, it's a real thing.

And back to the Joe Rogan's, I feel bad that men and boys get sucked into that. I have some pity for them, these desperate losers.

Anyways, Im sure I'm going to think this is dumb, but I just can't help but feel like there's a gigantic community of extremely disaffected people that while I mostly loathe, I also really feel bad for. I don't think it would've taken much to push me there, I grew up in a good environment with some good role models, but without that, left to the wolves, I'm as susceptible to the grifters as everyone is.

  • berrytopylus [she/her,they/them]
    ·
    2 years ago

    I mean yeah it's completely true that in a perfect world we shouldn't be attacking people for having small dicks or being short or whatever, but I also do think there can be some contextual usage there too. A person who prides themselves off of being "Grrr I'm rugged traditional conservative white man who rules over women and minorities" is going to be particularly irritated if it's pointed out that he's short. Men with ego issues might be better pointed out as "They're compensating for their self esteem issues" but I also can acknowledge it's funnier to say that they have a small dick because that makes them very very upset and is likely a part of their self esteem problems to begin with. These hypermasculine conservative assholes and their idealogy is after all, one of the major creators of these self esteem issues around men being "too short" or dicks being "too small" to begin with.

    On the other hand there is a very valid point "This hurts the good people with self esteem issues over their body just as much" so I try to refrain from it overall, but I do think that hypocrisy can be pointed out sometimes. Like a Nazi "superior race" dude being traditionally unattractive or disabled or something else the Nazis would hate seems fine to point out.

    • robot_dog_with_gun [they/them]
      ·
      2 years ago

      but I also do think there can be some contextual usage there too.

      fuck that, there's no tactical "x is gay" or calling black conservatives the n-word, or abusing fat comrades to get a shot in at trump that he'll never see.

    • GreenTeaRedFlag [any]
      ·
      2 years ago

      And it's also easy to say kamala harris wishes she were a man, or the current Italian PM has daddy issues. It's still incredibly rude, reductive, and does not further the discussion while insulting people who actually have problems around those issues.

    • grey_wolf_whenever [he/him]
      ·
      2 years ago

      Yeah, it's a thin wire to cross. And you're right, it's the kind of thing that none of us have the energy to defend, because who really cares at the end of the day if some men's rights activist Nazi gets his feelings hurt by being called a manlet, but it also does effect other people.