They told me they have hired "motivators" that make all the wishes come true. One of them's in the hospital room with me right now and he's brushing my hair and reading me all the books that transform the Star Wars movies into Shakespearian screenplays. He said not to say his name, but his name is Tony.
are gay people normally ineligible ??
They said and I quote "gay men are not allowed to make wishes here."