Imagine that this is written in, like, a Birmingham accent or something, I'm too ignorant of regional British accents to do a convincing patter

Yeah, sure, we gave up our healthcare system, once considered one of the best models of socialized medicine ever put into practice, leaving us permanently immiserated and indebted to private medicine, but they did build this really nice parking lot. It's got a portaloo the construction crew forgot to take and everything.