I have experienced trauma my entire life. I just got out of a very emotionally abusive relationship. I developed severe PTSD symptoms in the last few years.

I've always felt that maybe I don't think like most other people I encounter. I've always had a hard time connecting to people and seemed to attract some really bad people into my life.

I am very self aware, probably too much so. I am usually well liked and have never really had issues with social norms or anything. I do have some other habits that make me wonder. I've wondered if I'm schizophrenic before but I only meet a few of the criteria. My abusive ex tried to convince me I had borderline personality disorder, which I do have some symptoms of. However, these symptoms have lessoned since I left the relationship.

I think I might have high functioning autism, but I have never been evaluated. I am fairly intelligent and self aware so I know to hide a lot of my symptoms.

Anyways, I'm just wondering what are some traits you have?

  • milk_thief [it/its]
    ·
    24 days ago

    Oh right, so you are coming from a very different angle. Yea, my bad. I was seeing very heavy "bad actors ruin bpd for the REAL bpd sufferers" yesterday and that shaped my perception of the paragraph. Thank you for the elaborate and thoughtful reply! I do agree with your points now

    • ReadFanon [any, any]
      ·
      24 days ago

      I was seeing very heavy "bad actors ruin bpd for the REAL bpd sufferers" yesterday

      Oh yuck. Lol. That's a really gross attitude for someone to hold.

      It's all good though, I'm glad that it was just a miscommunication and I appreciate you sharing your thoughts and giving me the opportunity to clarify.

      I know it's no consolation but there's a similar sort of civil war raging within the autistic community - on one side is a faction where people are claiming to be the "real" autistic group, to the exclusion of higher support needs and non-speaking autistic people (these are the "it's not a disability, it's a superpower" types and the ones who refuse to recognise that there are difficult/harmful aspects of autism, even if they do not personally experience them, such as stims that can cause serious injury or having an extremely restricted diet to the point that it negatively impacts your health) and then on the other side is a faction that essentially wants to re-establish the Asperger's-Autism diagnostic divide because the lower support needs autistic people are "taking over" or, sometimes, that they are "stealing" supports and services from the people who genuinely deserve them. It's a real mess and I don't see it clearing up any time soon. The autistic community desperately needs its own Huey P Newton figure, I think.

      • milk_thief [it/its]
        ·
        24 days ago

        Yeah, I wanted to get active in my local "queer" stuff and it's too much infighting and the well-off people dominate and make it into like protest pyramid schemes and municipality funded cop hugging parades... I am also autistic, but besides professional ngo career people there is no one speaking in our name in my place and the ngo people are doing a godawful job obviously. My idealist impulses said that solidarity needs to like make a comeback (if it ever was there)but obv it's not that easy