So I am finally able to express insecurities about my body that I've held onto my whole life due to, you know, feeling like a singularly fucked up freak which unfortunately is a common experience for us autistics and neurodivergent folks. I've had some recent experiences that have me feeling pretty down about my body and I guess I want to write it down and get some validation from others that may share some of these experiences or have some guidance or information to understand myself better. Unfortunately, some of these "quirks" lead to some serious social avoidance behaviors and anxiety because I feel like I have no control over when my body seems to decide to just stop working properly. I just want to understand better why I, for example, can seemingly randomly lose my coordination and take an embarrassing tumble or knock over and break things; why I can overheat and start sweating profusely so easily; why my reflexes can be so reactive and I get jumpy or overreact, like having a gag reflex that can cause me to puke or spit up over nothing; why I can sometimes be very sensitive to pain or not feel it all; why I have IBS and other stomach issues that don't seem to correlate to any particular food or activity; why I have nerve pain in my legs and restless legs; why I can sometimes feel the constant urge to go to the bathroom or have embarrassing episodes of sexual dysfunction. I hope this post doesn't come across too much like a "woe is me" thing, just trying to understand myself better so I can stop feeling so insecure about something I can't control. How much of this is related to general executive dysfunction that is a hallmark of autism and ADHD? Does anyone else have similar experiences? Is it possible some of this is completely unrelated to neurodivergence? Do others also feel this way about their body?

  • hypercracker
    ·
    5 months ago

    Do you do any sports or other physical activity on a regular basis (2-3x/week)? Coordination is a skill you learn and maintain, not something you're born with.

    I am on the spectrum and yeah we have access to a lot less information about our current body & mental state. There are just various cues you have to pick up over time, and various approaches you have to try (combinations of clothes, hydration, length of time outside in whatever temperature) then see what the results are so you know what will probably lead to some outcome in the future. This takes a long time; I'm in my mid 30s and am still sorting out what combination of things can keep me from getting terribly sleepy after being outside for longer than ten minutes on a hot day.

    • ihaveibs [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      5 months ago

      I'm actually very coordinated when it comes to athletics... Until I'm not. It's very frustrating