The issue with age gap discourse is that it often devolves into conflating the (visible) potential for abuse with abuse itself. There's nothing you can say about an age gap in a relationship between two consenting adults that wouldn't equally apply to a relationship between two people who make drastically different incomes, or who have different levels of social aptitude with their friends and family, or differences in physical size/strength. It also starts to feel like invalidating abuse that isn't immediately clear just from looking at the people involved.