I clearly made a bad joke that didn't go over well. I was not advocating for any of these things. I know they're wildly inefficient and impractical. My point was that humans will do desperate and ridiculous things to keep tweetin' their tweets and getting into flame wars in the comment section of youtube videos, so power generation options which are obviously terrible are still on the table.

"using a stationary bike in the post-apocalypse to generate just enough power to press 'send tweet'" was meant to be so incredibly absurd that you couldn't take it seriously as a viable suggestion and my defense of that example was intended as a continuation of the bit