The news is horrific, conditions are rapidly deteriorating, the amount of homeless people I see everyday increases each time I commute to class, more stores are closing, the climate (especially in my area) has been royally fucked, etc.

On top of that, I’ve devoted fully to the student’s life, and I am regularly pulling 90-100 hour weeks between classes, lectures, projects, assignments, exams, studying, and working to stay alive. Everything is online, everyone wants to reach you every single hour of the day. I force myself to sleep 8 hours a day, so the little time I have to myself is for the bathroom, eating scraps, and chores.

I don’t have time to eat, let alone the money to do so. I just forget the eat many days, and I’ve lost a lot of weight. Don’t spend time with anyone except my partner whenever I get the chance, and if it wasn’t for them and my local party I feel like I would have snapped by now.

I don’t have the energy to do anything, and I’m still falling behind. I don’t even have the time anymore to volunteer with my party anymore, or attend any meetings. I feel like I’m failing the cause. Ironically the thing I’m studying is probably the best thing a communist could be, so I hope my work can bring meaningful change, but it seems like a cope.

Sorry if this was very venty. Things haven’t been good over here.