This is... frustratingly complicated and honestly I have no idea why I'm asking a leftist shitposting board obsessed with piggy poop balls but honestly I just... don't really have much of anywhere else to turn. Might as well scream into the void here

Deborah was my best friend since high school, and we've been extremely close since to the point where most people assumed we were either siblings or dating. We did so much together and generally got along with each other so very well. We hung out less after high school but we still kept in close touch, but after covid hit we really stopped seeing each other in person as nearly as often. We both had close, vulnerable friends and family so we needed to be extra careful. The effects of locking down had a pretty nasty toll on both of our mental healths and things have just really started to break down for the both of us. We became more and more distant but we still hung out occasionally. One day we went downtown to do a bit of shopping when she asked a seemingly innocuous question of "Who are you voting for" and I said "Not Joe Biden" in a rather joking manner because I assumed we were both operating off of similar principles

Deborah's politics have been a tad confusing for me. She seems to grasp that yes, capitalism is bad and shows enthusiasm at its decline and demise. We were both extremely hyped when we heard that Minneapolis PD got put to the torch and even talked about throwing an ACAB themed party rather jokingly. She even beared with me in my "no guise capitalism still good phase" assuming that one day I would learn better. Fortunately for all of us she was right. But I had always assumed that she was some variety of leftist or some other

And then she acted... really offended that I said I was voting third party. For frame of reference, we're both cis, white, middle class queer young adults that live in Washington. The only major difference between us is that I'm a cis guy and she is a cis woman, and then she went on the whole... lib tangent. You know the one. Lesser evil. Supreme court (this was before RBG died). Orange man bad. Third party vote is a vote for Trump. But what she really kept going on about was how she kept going on to the effect of "You're a man, you do not understand what it is like to have the problems of a woman or how it is to feel like your rights are at a threat". Which I didn't exactly have an easy counterpoint to. While it's fairly obvious to all of us here that Joe Fucking Biden is literally a rapist and does not stand for women's rights, how did you get it into your head that he ever did, I couldn't just... SAY that. Deborah has always been helpful in pointing out the toxic masculine things that end up baked into the minds of a cis guy in this bitch ass society and has worked with me in trying to fix those flaws, and I couldn't just say "fuck you bitch, I am a man and I know what's best for you" because that would only prove her point. I explained to her that we live in a solid blue state that has no chance of flipping red, and that even if Washington DID flip red, Donald Trump would have such an IMMENSE national lead that he would have won in a 375+ point landslide and that my vote in Washington really doesn't matter; she still went back to the "You're a man you don't get it" explanation, so I figured I might as well drop it because it very clearly wasn't going anywhere

And now (skipping a bit of further friendship deterioration because fuck me this is getting long) we no longer hung out one on one because she just stopped feeling comfortable around me and me alone (for other reasons of varying validity. Not all of them were just her being a lib), to the point where after a phone call where we tried to mend this argument ended in tears and Deborah's BF texting me and calling me a mansplainer, we've both mutually admitted to each other that we have both genuinely considered not being friends, which like, 6 months ago would have HORRIFIED me, she's been my closest friend for about 4 years now and has really helped me through a lot of tough shit, and I've done the same for her and now we're legitimately considering going out separate ways?

And what really is starting to worry me is that I'm not scared of losing her anymore. I've emotionally checked out of this relationship and I know that even if we patch things up we'll almost certainly not be as close as we once were. I was willing to look this shit all over. I wasn't chastising her for who she voted for. I didn't tell her to go vote third party. I wasn't acting like voting for Joe Biden was a major breach of my trust. But she was doing that to me. She was bothered by this, and she was making this a breaking point. It's gotten to the point where she basically has to decide between me and Joe Biden; and what is absolutely MORTIFYING is that she's looking like she's about to choose the rapey war criminal

I really, really tried patiently explaining this to her. I told her that A. Washington is a solid blue state with no chance of flipping and that B. the only scenario where it could flip is one where Donald Trump would have such an immense national lead that Washington's 12 EC votes wouldn't fucking matter so that there is no strategic imperative to vote for Joe Biden. I explained to her that he lied to the entire country about Iraq having WMDs in order to justify an invasion that killed several hundred thousand civilians, he literally wrote the fucking crime bill, he raped a woman and he spoke out against gay marriage as recently as 2013. That he's a senile career politician who has repeatedly thrown out what little he believes in for political gain, and that I have no reason on principle to vote for him either. That I have no reason, strategic or principled, to vote for Joe Biden

And then she digs even DEEPER into the lib shit and starts going on about how it's important to boost the visibility of the popular vote like that somehow matters??? Which was literally my entire reason for voting third party??? I'm just... genuinely at a loss for words. No matter what I do, I can NOT convince her that Joe Biden does not act in her interests and that it's an EXTREMELY white liberal woman privileged take in order to say that. She's mad at me because I refuse to uphold her white liberal bubble and brushes off my criticisms of Joe Biden with the simple excuse of "You don't get it because you're a man". I have another friend who is a woman. A trans woman. Who 100% agrees with everything that I'm saying in that "No, Joe Biden is not your friend"

I'm genuinely at a loss. I'm about to lose my closest friend because she wants to live in her white liberal bubble and keeps calling me a mansplainer when I tell her the very blatantly obvious truth of "joe biden bad". At this point I genuinely don't know if there is anything I CAN do here than just accept her choice. I can't convince her she's wrong and I think we're just both done with being friends at this point. I'm just upset that she literally did this over joe fucking biden

If anyone actually made it through to the end here, thank you for reading this rambling mess. I just needed to scream into the void. I'm just tired of being called an asshole for patiently explaining the uncomfortable truth