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for Cringetopia users
Also I hope people in here are decent about plurals. r/fakedisordercringe is another one of the "be normal 
" instances
for Cringetopia users
Also I hope people in here are decent about plurals. r/fakedisordercringe is another one of the "be normal " instances
The entire point of xenogender labels is that to the people using these, it is a way to make their gender identity legible to them and being able to conceptualize it. It's the very opposite of inscrutable. Even when we view gender as a spectrum between the poles man and woman, there's people who do not find themselves anywhere on that, they are outside of the charted territory of what Western society views as scrutable gender expressions. So they need an approximation of how they feel about and understand the gendered part of their personality, a shorthand for their concept of the self, their body image and their gender performance. Nonbinary is in large parts a catch-all term, and it is one that says what people are not. Saying "i'm not this" does not answer the question "what am i?". I like large, open-ended labels a lot, but i get the need that many people have for microlabels to articulate their experience.
And i'll be honest here, i've met more than one nonbinary person irl where it would have made perfect sense for that elflike being to say "my pronouns are fae / faer". I wouldn't have doubted that one second. I've lurked in communities of people who can best conceptualize themselves as androids or energy beings and none of that seemed anything stranger than the self-image i have on a good dose of LSD - when my mind is able to produce such a state with a few microgramms of ergotamines, i do not find it hard to grasp that some people feel that way all the time even when stone cold sober. Especially when they're nonbinary and present in ways that make people call them a "thing" or an "it" to begin with. A lot of NB folks have had experiences of what they call "being creatured", having their humanity and even their personhood doubted and denied to them. Is it such a stretch that some of them arive at a point where they wonder if they even need to view themselves as a person when just acting naturally means others cannot see them that way anymore?
As a trans person, i understand both that our gender identity can be hard to grasp for outsiders and that we have a right to self-identification, and i also know the transmedicalist history (and in many parts still ongoing present-day status quo) of excluding non-binary people from community support and from access to gender-affirming care. So i'm not going around doubting other people's gender identity or saying their pronouns do not make any sense, and it's honestly kinda sad to see how quickly xenogender people are doubted even in a space like this. DroneRights probably was more than a bit of a troll in that it came off as willfully antagonistic, but i don't think it was trolling us about that it could best understand itself as a de-personalized borg drone.
i meant inscrutable to the rest of us. my experience around people finding solace or self-understanding or whatever in labels comes from "oh that was x all along" and is bundled up in other people before them having some experience of non-normativity and communicating about it. I guess somebody has to be first, but a new label doesn't have any of that context and i'm not sure how or if it carries any information. That doesn't invalidate someone's gender but it means they're not communicating any of the things that you or I do when we say woman or agender or somebody else says nonbinary.
I feel like you don't need a robust understanding of the specifics of "neither" or "something else" to add agender and nonbinary as umbrella to the canonical western reckoning of gender, but trying to establish a new specific one is a different project from what we've done before. It's not doubt it's you've said something that i take at your word has meaning to you but doesn't tell me anything, like explaining colors to someone who has never seen them, except there's no well established physics to draw on. There are surely genders that I don't know what they are but i literally can't think anything about them because i have no referent underlying the words.
as for the psych heavy stuff I was originally asking after a credible explanation and it seems to not be available, and i don't know about all that. Our brains can do all kinds of weird and wonderful things but the way people recall experiences and report them isn't methodologically rigorous so i don't know how i'm supposed to tell the difference between stuff like sleep paralysis hallucinations and things I apparently can't read about anywhere.