What the fuck did you just say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class at Harvard, and I've been involved in numerous secret essays on Astronomy, and i have over 300 confirmed citations. I am trained in stellar evolution and i am the top star identifier in the entire US Scientific Community. You are nothing to me but just another dwarf star. I will catalogue you the fuck up with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with coronal mass ejecting that shit at me over the internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak i am contacting my secret network of space telescopes across the USA and your spectroscopic fingerprint is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your luminosity. You're fucking red, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and i can summarize you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my brain hands. Not only am i extensively trained in spectral analysis, but i have access to the entire capacity of the United States Very Large Array and I will use it to its full extent to catalogue your miserable ass on the face of the galaxy, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "bright" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have stayed in your fucking sunspot. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will stellar forensics all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking red, kiddo.
ok ok NDGT Navy Seals Edit, since nobody asked:
What the fuck did you just say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class at Harvard, and I've been involved in numerous secret essays on Astronomy, and i have over 300 confirmed citations. I am trained in stellar evolution and i am the top star identifier in the entire US Scientific Community. You are nothing to me but just another dwarf star. I will catalogue you the fuck up with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with coronal mass ejecting that shit at me over the internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak i am contacting my secret network of space telescopes across the USA and your spectroscopic fingerprint is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your luminosity. You're fucking red, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and i can summarize you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my brain hands. Not only am i extensively trained in spectral analysis, but i have access to the entire capacity of the United States Very Large Array and I will use it to its full extent to catalogue your miserable ass on the face of the galaxy, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "bright" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have stayed in your fucking sunspot. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will stellar forensics all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking red, kiddo.
I would have gone for "and that's just with pen and paper", but yours is probably funnier