Does anybody else do this?

I've finally realized that the weird imbalance I feel in every relationship I actually care about is that I am far more deeply interested in other people than they are me. I've come to the realization that I make other people a special interest for myself, and that it hurts me when they don't reciprocate this thing that they admittedly never asked for but do happily soak up.

What do?

I'm finally going to have to scrape up the money for therapy and the courage to actually talk to someone other than an anonymous internet rando about this, aren't I? You guys can't actually tell me the magic words to fix me, right?

I am not loving it

  • GriffithDidNothingWrong [comrade/them]
    ·
    9 months ago

    Thing is, you can't read minds. How do you know to what degree people are interested in you? Do you have them put a drop of blood in the interest-o-meter and then compare results? Do they tell you that they are not interested? Or do you hyper analyze everything they do and try to plot out exactly how interested they are and then gauge it off a metric you've personally developed that may be heavily skewed by your lack of self-esteem? People tend to do the latter.

    Absolutely do seek therapy but also unless people specifically tell you you're doing something wrong don't assume you know exactly how they feel about the things you do. Different people express and react to things differently. I don't have any magic for you comrade, I wish I did, but I'd bet good money you're hurting yourself more than anyone else intends

    • the_itsb [she/her, comrade/them]
      ·
      9 months ago

      Or do you hyper analyze everything they do and try to plot out exactly how interested they are and then gauge it off a metric you've personally developed that may be heavily skewed by your lack of self-esteem? People tend to do the latter.

      uh oh

      :side-eye-1: :side-eye-2:

      Well, fuck.