Been trying to unmask for half a year+ now and it's difficult, numbingly depressing, and extremely damaging to my reputation (in places that do matter, not just pointless social status standing)
The end of the tunnel leads to a beautiful forest full of life and light though right?
I grew up isolated and with zero friends. I never really had people to talk to so I never learned to mask as much? I also never got diagnosed or anyone paid enough attention to consider I was autistic. I've struggled my whole life and was oblivious to it too. I remember bawling my eyes out at 16 to my mother asking her why I had no friends. (She stayed silent and juat watched me) But I just came off weird and strange. Not know social cues or the proper etiquette and what not. I'd be polite but blunt too. But this is me in hindsight, I only found out a few years back and I know being the way I was hindered me a lot. I still don't mask, I still get exhausted in social situations. I try to be more aware of it and I try to be careful with how I come across but people still treat me like I'm spare furniture if there's more than two people. I become invisible when out too. It can be very lonely.