• CloutAtlas [he/him]
    hexbear
    82
    2 months ago

    School assembly in the gymnasium, principal reading from a Victims of Communism Memorial "fact"sheet

    "And then Mao personally executed over a billion landlords, which cau-"

    He is cut off by cheering and applause, some of which are coming from the custodial staff, other teachers and the vice principal

    "This was actually a bad thing beca-"

    His mic is cut off entirely as Celebration by Kool & the Gang somehow starts blaring from the speakers

    "Children, I am trying to teach you about the dan-" he tries to yell above the music after realizing the mic was cut off

    🎵Celebrate good times, c'mon🎵

    "Now, I don't much care for communists, but I can stand by a man that done hates his landlord" an elderly man with a southern drawl wearing overalls inexplicably in a Floridian school gymnasium says before lighting a hand rolled cigarette indoors with a non-safety match he ignites on aforementioned overalls

    The entire Jacksonville Jaguars arrive on the scene, throwing out free merch and signing autographs, rolls out and proceeds to win the next Super Bowl

    Deep sleeper agent, Comrade DeSantis knows what he's doing.