I've encountered a weird thing with some sexual partners where they seem to think it's shallow to acknowledge that they find you physically attractive as well as emotionally attractive.
But like, it's a sexual relationship, are bodies are part of it, it'd be weird if we were plutonic friends but enjoying each others bodies is part of our relationship here so I don't see how it's shallow for us to express our enjoyment of each others bodies to one another.
'taking it slow' is coded for more serious relationships culturally, even if that's kind of silly and sex-negative. the 'hookup' is supposed to be ephemeral and shallow
i think this is very enmeshed in patriarchal norms with people trying to recreate a more old fashioned courtship for a potential spouse while consciously/subconsciously devaluing and shaming casual sex. don't get me wrong i also see how it sounds like they're saying the guy is not attractive, but he and other men gotta understand we still live under patriarchy and it makes people think differently (i mean wanting your partner to think you're adonis is weird patriarchy too, deserve love even if they don't roil loins in the stereotypical way)
it took me long enough to type that up that i missed most of the discussion, lol sorry for addressing things other people brought up
however you're being a bit too rigid in your interpretation of the text. we don't have a quote, just an explanation from one party of what they said. we're all just extrapolating on delivery/timing/vocabulary that was used so we can't actually litigate this particular situation with accuracy. but it's a vehicle to talk about relationships and patriarchy and we love to do that don't we folks
None of these explanations are adequate to me because she literally did not say it, so all of this has somehow become "I don't find you attractive" instead of "I find you attractive and worth more than just a fwb, I'd spend my life with you"
Like you can explain it how a million times but it just wasn't said so it doesn't matter lmao
See that’s your interpretation, but not actually what she said.
and removed you keep pulling the same dumbass "she implied he wasn't attractive" out of thin air, and calling me an idiot lmao! sorry for being autistic and taking shit literally, kiss my Black fucking ass dipshit
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I've encountered a weird thing with some sexual partners where they seem to think it's shallow to acknowledge that they find you physically attractive as well as emotionally attractive.
But like, it's a sexual relationship, are bodies are part of it, it'd be weird if we were plutonic friends but enjoying each others bodies is part of our relationship here so I don't see how it's shallow for us to express our enjoyment of each others bodies to one another.
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'taking it slow' is coded for more serious relationships culturally, even if that's kind of silly and sex-negative. the 'hookup' is supposed to be ephemeral and shallow
i think this is very enmeshed in patriarchal norms with people trying to recreate a more old fashioned courtship for a potential spouse while consciously/subconsciously devaluing and shaming casual sex. don't get me wrong i also see how it sounds like they're saying the guy is not attractive, but he and other men gotta understand we still live under patriarchy and it makes people think differently (i mean wanting your partner to think you're adonis is weird patriarchy too,
deserve love even if they don't roil loins in the stereotypical way)
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it took me long enough to type that up that i missed most of the discussion, lol sorry for addressing things other people brought up
however you're being a bit too rigid in your interpretation of the text. we don't have a quote, just an explanation from one party of what they said. we're all just extrapolating on delivery/timing/vocabulary that was used so we can't actually litigate this particular situation with accuracy. but it's a vehicle to talk about relationships and patriarchy and we love to do that don't we folks
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This
I'mma ask every person in this thread where she said this because if she didn't outright say this then why are people drawing this conclusion?
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None of these explanations are adequate to me because she literally did not say it, so all of this has somehow become "I don't find you attractive" instead of "I find you attractive and worth more than just a fwb, I'd spend my life with you"
Like you can explain it how a million times but it just wasn't said so it doesn't matter lmao
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and removed you keep pulling the same dumbass "she implied he wasn't attractive" out of thin air, and calling me an idiot lmao! sorry for being autistic and taking shit literally, kiss my Black fucking ass dipshit