It's like this every year. If you know, you know.
I never really had a fondness for fucking christmas spirit or whatever so it figures I'd have no affection for anything holiday related I guess. But my significant other has both considerable trauma (bad experiences on and around the day) and and a desire for doing something together on the day.
When I moved out a few years ago, I thought finally I'd be able to do cool and original things around it, y'know build up our own little traditions. That's a thing people do, right? But my stupidass job had me working the week of the 25th like every other year if not more, so half the time I wasn't even off. Lmao, no spoons.
I also figured that now I'm fired due to being increasingly deathly ill, I would truly have the time and spoons to do stuff for the holidays! I can use some of that sweet sweet gubmint money what I stole from hardworking taxpayers (what a welfare queen lmao) to do something nice for us, right?? I'm sure I won't be equally if not moreso bereft of spoons due to a multitude of things including eviction hearings, chronic pain and more???
Right?????
It just exhausts me and I hate absolutely fucking everything. That bit post about banning christmas under communism is something I uncritically support. I dunno.
As I've grown older, I've noticed just how stressful the holiday seasons actually are. There's just so much weird and random family drama that gets relitigated because this is the time family is together under one roof where the drama relitigation can promptly commence in person. However, I wouldn't say it's a purely negative thing either. It just wind up being intensely stressful. It almost feels like getting the day off from work is more so I can swap bullshit work stress with bullshit family stress.
No kidding, it's wild. Hate it :)