Turns out the reply in my thread telling me the best way to combat not caring about Linux is to care about Linux was absolutely correct.
I picked up a laptop, installed Linux Mint Cinnamon, and I'm already obsessed. I haven't had this much fun with a PC in a long time and it's just a cheapo Dell Inspiron 3520.
While this Linux thread is so hot imma ask...
Having issues getting battery display to work on Mx Linux fluxbox 32 bit
No battery tray exists in settings and it does not work on conky.
Running in an Asus transformer t100ta
I'm in the wrong thread but maybe I get lucky 😕
Thanks!!
Edit: Thanks everyone below for help. Giga what you said sounds beyond me but I'll try to do some research.
So far I've tried modifying some lines on conky that typically resorts to battery displaying at zero.
Besides no battery display mx Linux works great out of the box, even recognizes some pesky network drivers that seem to be a common issue.
Edit 2: installed mx Linux xfce instead. It works out of the box with touch screen and battery indicator.
I'm new to Linux and will use this over fluxbox for now. If I feel its necessary I'll reinstall fluxbox and actually learn what I'm doing.
Thanks to everyone below for the support and laughs. 👍
Edit 3: seems video playback is broken in both versions. It seemed to work perfectly when running on the USB. Imma have to get my life together and figure out what I'm doing before asking for more help.
You're asking for help in entirely the wrong way, here I'll fix it for you:
"Linux is shit. I have an Asus Transformer T100TA and I thought I'd try MX Linux and fluxbox. I poked around for a few minutes and couldn't get any sort of battery display to work on it, when it's fully functional by default in windows. If this is the best that Linux can do in 2023, forget it, I'm sticking with windows."
There. That oughta do it!