Wait until you learn about emotional support trucks:

• Tires: mud knobs with shiny untouched rims
• Body: lifted and oversized
• Headlamps: blinding LEDs at eye level
• Safety: invisible pedestrians
• Bed: pristine
• Economy: gallons to the mile
• Your ass: ridden

Topped off with muddy, fart machine sounds coming from their distorted overdriven bass. They spend the whole drive giggling. I'm not sure if it's from the toddler sense of humor at the fart noises or the plausible deniability when running over a cyclist.