Buy a bass guitar, and try to figure out how to play slap bass. Turn it WAYYY up. A flurry of noise, 40 second pause, rinse + repeat. You don’t need anything expensive. Just a LOUD amp. Even better - put earplugs in - blast your stereo and then play something with a different BPM. Humans have a sensitive ear believe it or not, and as a rule, non-musician white people are allergic to polyrhythms (jokes, ppl, I am not serious in any blanket statement, pls don’t kill me). So you got some Rammstein bumping, and then play some smooth R+B thru the bass. YOU DON’T NEED TO KNOW HOW TO PLAY. Just have a pile of spite. I mean fuck, most amps have a distortion button. Don’t use a tuner. Don’t try to make music - make noise. (Merzbow, anyone?) This is a plan for psychological warfare. It will drive anyone (but you, because lol, making noise on any instrument is really fun, trust me) fucking batshit. Also, answer the door with your bass on and in playing position, when your neighbors complain, because they will. Then deny deny deny that it’s you, just like that shitbird neighbor.
You can also hook up a bass guitar to a regular stereo, a few adapters is all you need. (Besides Bass and instrument cable.)
Please believe me when I say you can get a pawn shop bass REALLY cheap. Get the one that has the most dust on it. (Just make sure it works, electronically speaking.) I’m talking 40-50 bucks. Especially if you get an amp as well, you’ll be able to get a deal. Again - look for dust. 90% of all pawn shops I’ve been in are more than willing to bundle instrument and amp. They are more than happy to get rid of them. Because, again, you can find these at any pawn’er. And as a rule, there’s that one amp that has been there for 10+ years.
-good luck and sorry if I’m too bougie. Assuming you have money to spare. Or… the opposite too. Sorry to assume you don’t have money.
For me - spite is priceless. I don’t hold self-destructive grudges, but fuck, I don’t forget.
Buy a bass guitar, and try to figure out how to play slap bass. Turn it WAYYY up. A flurry of noise, 40 second pause, rinse + repeat. You don’t need anything expensive. Just a LOUD amp. Even better - put earplugs in - blast your stereo and then play something with a different BPM. Humans have a sensitive ear believe it or not, and as a rule, non-musician white people are allergic to polyrhythms (jokes, ppl, I am not serious in any blanket statement, pls don’t kill me). So you got some Rammstein bumping, and then play some smooth R+B thru the bass. YOU DON’T NEED TO KNOW HOW TO PLAY. Just have a pile of spite. I mean fuck, most amps have a distortion button. Don’t use a tuner. Don’t try to make music - make noise. (Merzbow, anyone?) This is a plan for psychological warfare. It will drive anyone (but you, because lol, making noise on any instrument is really fun, trust me) fucking batshit. Also, answer the door with your bass on and in playing position, when your neighbors complain, because they will. Then deny deny deny that it’s you, just like that shitbird neighbor.
You can also hook up a bass guitar to a regular stereo, a few adapters is all you need. (Besides Bass and instrument cable.)
Please believe me when I say you can get a pawn shop bass REALLY cheap. Get the one that has the most dust on it. (Just make sure it works, electronically speaking.) I’m talking 40-50 bucks. Especially if you get an amp as well, you’ll be able to get a deal. Again - look for dust. 90% of all pawn shops I’ve been in are more than willing to bundle instrument and amp. They are more than happy to get rid of them. Because, again, you can find these at any pawn’er. And as a rule, there’s that one amp that has been there for 10+ years.
-good luck and sorry if I’m too bougie. Assuming you have money to spare. Or… the opposite too. Sorry to assume you don’t have money.
For me - spite is priceless. I don’t hold self-destructive grudges, but fuck, I don’t forget.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk.