Edit: Okay, wow. if the statement from a woman of “we owe you nothing” immediately sets you off emotionally, I would really encourage you to think through why that might be.

A more systemic phrasing could have been “we owe the patriarchy nothing”. I changed it to that for a second before realizing, again, that it was fine. A guy that has worked through internalized patriarchy around this will understand it’s not about them.

Patriarchy on the whole conditions men towards having a sense of entitlement towards women’s bodies, time, attention, labor, etc. It also conditions women that they should feel obligated to provide this without setting boundaries or expecting reciprocal solidarity.

Remember, we literally all have degrees of internalized bigotry, misogyny, racism, transphobia, etc because these are systemic issues. Our responsibility to ourselves and our comrades is to work through that. You are not a bad person for finding those brainworms in yourself, only if you refuse to do the work to address them.

    • Sen_Jen [they/them]
      ·
      3 года назад

      I'm going in circles making the same points here.

      If someone is your friend, including if they are a woman, you can expect some support from them.

      You should not expect support from someone by virtue of them being a woman. You can and should expect support from someone by virtue of having a personal relationship with them.

      Many women have had problems with men, especially online, telling them their intimate problems when they don't know each other very well and expecting the woman to have an answer.

      • TankGirl [she/her]
        hexagon
        ·
        3 года назад

        YES. This :10000-com:x. Thank you for doing the work here to explain it further.