title

except my bf hes the one good male and will force the rest into submission :meow-hug:

  • Ideology [she/her]
    ·
    2 years ago

    My issue with this sort of thing is that it's all about spectacle. Girls/fembies/etc. on here who vent are looking for others to commiserate with. Men or people who identify with them see the title and then inflate the spectacle instead of allowing it to be a small vent thread that drops off the TL. Similarly, posts about sexism in non-leftists explode in popularity with dunks of "I'm glad I'm not like that."

    But when people try to post constructive helpful threads for working through stuff it gets 6-16 replies and 24 upvotes at best. Men want to complain about the patriarchy in other men but working on themselves is not a focus. Hell, I'm still working on myself and my post history shows that I'm trying to share the results of that with others. I can't be everywhere all at once but I feel like I am at least trying to practice what I preach.

      • Kanna [she/her]
        ·
        2 years ago

        I can pass that feedback to the mod team, but I'm not an admin/sitemod (or mod of this comm). I also don't have any negativity towards you

      • Ideology [she/her]
        ·
        2 years ago

        I don't think you're a bad person, Melty. I mean, I guess you wouldn't know cause the one time we interacted I just gave you some advice on a fightstick, lol. I'm fully on board that wrangling users is a pain and a half, been there.

        I'm just kind of frustrated with this place on a technical level. It always feels like you're fighting the software in a way I generally don't have to on vanilla. Even just having user-level blocks would be gamechanging. Putting the default view back on subscriptions would help avoid cross-contamination issues and make special interest comms more visible (and whoever put the view-change button behind the cogwheel on mobile, just, ugh). A lot of the aesthetic changes to this place put all the focus on the main TL and make exploring comms a huge pain, so people spend 99% of their energy on the front page of the site rather than clicking the convenient comm links that Lemmy has sitting right in the sidebar, always visible. I think it kind of homogenizes things.

      • kristina [she/her]
        hexagon
        ·
        edit-2
        2 years ago

        should have been locked

        No, I specifically asked for it not to be and honestly got really angry when they did it without asking me my opinion and then following it up with calling me reactionary over something that wasn't reactionary in the slightest

        Like yeah, I am distraught, but I'm gonna be distraught for the next couple of days anyways and while I can vent to my bf and hes awesome for it I like to talk to other (anonymous) people with similar experiences