Xi presses the Taiwan earthquake button.
Then he presses the NYC earthquake button.
Where will he strike next?? 
Don't forget to tune in for an analysis from our China watcher John Dungoof.
- LAUNCH SPY BALLOON DEPLOY SECRET POLICE STATION ACTIVATE MANCHURIAN CANDIDATE
- ENGAGE HUAWEI TIKTOK 5G MIND CONTROL TOWERS SOW DISTRUST IN TESLA WITH CHEAP EVS CONQUER EAST ASIA WITH TRAINS AND INFRASTRUCTURE
- REVERSE MITCH MCDONALDS SISTER OR WHATEVER INTO A POND MAKA DA BOAT HIT DA BRIDGE HEHE
What's funnier is that this was repeated in non-satirical publication
...In this context, China’s strategic priority is to avoid doing anything that would interrupt the process of U.S. decline...
Sorry, the button's got no juice. I don't see two tea cups.
He's been hitting the button too much this last week, just being brazen about it and stopped trying to use it in a way that won't get him found out. /s
