House: What kind of infectious disease causes pulminary embalismes, reduced lung capacity, high grade fevers, muscle fatigue, and doesn't appear on any our tests.

Foreman: Any number of influenzas or lung infections. Why are we wasting our time, treat her symptoms, keep her in isolation, and wait for the disease to run it's course.

Cameron: I agree, nothing presents this as out of the ordinary with these symptoms.

House: But there's one new symptom. Complete loss of smell and taste.

COMMERCIAL BREAK

    • BowlingForDeez [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      2 years ago

      House: Foreman, run a CT scan. If there's brain damage caused by the lack of oxygen we need to know about it now. Chase, here's a book on all known viral infections. Start with the letter A and let's hope it's in the beginning of the alphabet. And Cameron, call Fort Detrick in Maryland. Better send them blood samples too.

      Cameron: Fort Detrick the military base? She's never been in the army.

      House: I know, but this disease has to have come from somewhere. Fort Detrick houses some of the world's most deadliest diseases. In case we need to go to war with Russia. I know, but nobody told them the Cold War is over.

      Cameron: But why me?

      House: Because you're an immunoligist. And because soldiers like pretty girls. See if you can offer them a date. Let's go people.

    • BowlingForDeez [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      2 years ago

      Why are 20 soldiers across 3 branches exhibiting the same symptoms? And don't say syphilis, we discovered that 400 years ago. And besides, don't ask, don't tell.

  • FlakesBongler [they/them]
    ·
    2 years ago

    I wish there was an episode of The Shield where Vic Mackey went to rob the Armenian COVID Train

    • BowlingForDeez [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      2 years ago

      God damnit Dutch! How many other errands do you got us running for the D.A.?