Probably an odd question as it pertains to myself specifically, but I thought maybe others here have had similar experiences and can tell me.
When I was a kid I used to really get immersed into the games I played; I'd feel as though I was actually, feeling the very walls around me in dungeon crawlers, getting tense in fights and such, but nowadays I don't really get that sense any more. I'm in my mid-30's and now I'm thankfully able to afford any game I wish, I thankfully can choose how long I spend gaming, yet I just can't get immersed, I just can't get pulled in anymore.
My buddy told me about the Witcher 3 and told me it's great and immersive like only the oldest games ever were, and yet when I played it....I got kind of bored, and lost interest somewhat fast. One possibility is that maybe with modern proliferation of game knowledge, we can simply google for anything we want rather than let the game help us find what we need, pulling us out for that much of the game, another possibility is that we recognize mechanics and animations for what they are, and we try and memorize enemy combat animations, and our own iframes and such, even if instinctively.
I honestly can't remember the last game I played where I got immersed into the game and just felt the world rather than just see it.
What works for me is Storytelling gaming, so sitting with friends (and those that become friends) around a table on nice couches and creating realities and your own mind kino.
In terms of games there are few that interest me which is one of the reasons Disco Elysium was so surprising. Mostly I gave up on gaming due to similar circumstances and it was a good choice.
I do indeed enjoy DnD, and it gives me the opportunity to engage in story telling, or to experience a story with living breathing people rather than hard coded NPCs, but that requires commitment and I really don't like having to commit when I can't tell if anything will come up or if I'll lose interest that week in playing with the group.
Yeah, good luck getting five adults with adult lives together once a month. You'll need a pool of at least a dozen, if not more, because people will flake out and no-show all the time. They like the idea of getting together and playing far more than they actually like getting together and playing.
The trick is to sometimes take the kids with you and have a circle of like 12 people plus minus a few variable ones who do a lot of care work in a circle so that as collective people can get more free time out of it. It is hard to create, but honestly without it I would run up walls.