[CW: (Internalized) Queerphobia]
I have not convinced myself that I should be proud of my queer identity. I've seen 100 reasons to be ashamed of it and 0 to be proud of it.
Pride month seems like a joke to me. It's a month where we're supposed to celebrate ourselves for who we are, but it only generates the opposite attitude for me.
You can be "proud" of yourself for being queer, but that's only if you're not too queer. I am too queer for even other queer people to think I deserve to exist, let alone experience pride in the way I exist.
9/10 queer folks are also ableist as fuck and have no intention nor desire to interrogate any of it so pride month is largely meaningless to me too. Trans rights are human rights, unless you’re a certain type of human, in which case it doesn’t matter how trans or queer you are, you don’t matter. I feel no solidarity with even radical queers these days. They’re taking unmasked selfies completely oblivious just like the guys who say injecting horse tranquilizer after your raw egg smoothie breakfast cures HIV. This is different from your struggle, but I get it.