"Also, I don't exercise, but if a Civil War broke out, I would totally be the hero. What do you mean, the most important skill in surviving a fire fight is the ability to find cover and be able to get to it? Why would I need cover? Look at how badass this gun I own is!"
Me: "You could go to the gym, even plenty of conserva-"
:grill-broke:: "NO! Work gotta be my only hobby! Sorry I'm too IMPORTANT to exercise, loser!"
"Also, I don't exercise, but if a Civil War broke out, I would totally be the hero. What do you mean, the most important skill in surviving a fire fight is the ability to find cover and be able to get to it? Why would I need cover? Look at how badass this gun I own is!"