- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion@lemmy.ml
- nottheonion@lemm.ee
- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion@lemmy.ml
- nottheonion@lemm.ee
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I see they moved on from telling us not to have avocado to toast to just not have any toast.
Pro-tip: You can save money on living expenses if you just live in a cardboard box by the roadside and die.
My prescriptions cost so much too. Maybe I should just stop taking my antidepressants and see how it rides out. .
I hope whoever wrote this trips in their bathroom and gets a severe brain injury.
the person who greenlit this article for publishing does
Editor: "I could spend the next 10 minutes reading this article before publishing, or go to lunch early."
News sites will do anything to get engagement and attention. ANYTHING.
"In fact, do you even NEED a home? You can just sleep at work like a good little corporate slave! "
There's a webcomic about a world where almost no one sleeps anymore thanks to a new drug. And they work 16 hours a day.
16 hours a day in a world where no one has to sleep seems wildly optimistic
They act like most of us even have time to make breakfast like we're living in some 90's sitcom
It's people like you that make me look like an asshole. Every morning I wake up at 3am to squeeze orange juice, make sausage gravy, biscuits, waffles, 5 omelettes, 40 pancakes, 6lbs of bacon, hash browns, buttered toast, and right after my son comes down the stairs, puts his ball cap on, grabs a single piece of bacon, heads out the door in a rush, I chase him down with a PB&J he inevitably always forgets. But it's not like I want to waste 40lbe of food per day. Some days I just want my son to sit down and eat the 40lbs of food I prepared. He may think I'm overbearing but I'm really overcaring.
We need a Marx-as-Clippy emoji for "it seems that it may be time to improve society somewhat. Would you like help with that?"
"We know life is Hard, but have you tried Ultra Hard by skipping the most important meal of the day and starting out famished?"
Off topic but I don't think breakfast is any more or less important than a meal any other time of the day. Most days I only eat one big meal around dinnertime and maybe have a few bites of some snack throughout the day. I've been like that for years now it started from doing 12 hour construction shifts where I'd just work all day with a coffee and maybe an apple or something then eat a big meal once I was home. I don't do construction anymore but the way I eat stuck with me. It's probably worth pointing out that I'm very fit and a healthy bodyweight (5'10 152lbs) and I don't suffer any negative effects from living like this. I'd say I'm healthier than 90% of the people I know.
the most important meal of the day bullshit was invented by america, fuckin milk lobby and shit somene else explain it I don't care enough to
To save even more money, switch over completely to a diet of things you find on the ground.
To save even more money, stop bathing, showering and brushing your teeth.
To save even more money, stop living in a house and move into the sewers.
To save even more money, stop wearing clothes.
To save even more money, stop communicating with expensive words, settling instead for grunting, growling and maybe barking like a dog. Consider filing your teeth pointy.
To save even more money, stop using tools. Emerge from your sewer hideout only at night to prowl the streets on all fours, feral and bewildered, eyes grown pale and milky from years in the dark sewers darting maniacally back and forth while your filth-encrusted teeth and nails twitch in anticipation of the slightest movement.
This is how I was able to afford a starter house by age 30. This and a $400 000 loan from my father.
i wish poverty diet actually made it easier to stay in shape
instead i just have an eating disorder from chronic food insecurity
