Gig economy giant Door Dash is now extending their services to include cleaning services advertised at those who live amongst their clutter. CEO Derick Dash claims that a survey conducted late 2023 found that 67% of customers had a minimum of three previous orders worth of trash accumulated in their rooms. “This is profit” Dash said, “the more people stay in the less likely they are to go out, in turn perpetuating the cycle of isolation and cutting them off from society and in turn, creating loyal customers who await their food on their door step. The “humanity” in introducing this new model into our system, the caretaker, we reawaken a part of our customers brains similarly to that of the mother, the mother comes, the mother cleans, the mother feeds, Door Dash is the mother that has been absent from our customers lives once they’re reach adulthood.” The TED audience stood and cheered for the length of an entire presentation, roughly 45 minutes. We asked audiences what they thought.

Barry Gillmore: “I love when businesses think like a family, makes it a lot more easier to grow attached to. You have a loyal customer in me”

Sarah Spaghetti: “I think this genius idea is one of those that comes and goes much like a comet, Steve Jobs was one of those comets and now I’m feeling the same about Door Dash. I don’t even need my mom anymore”

Kyle Cumming: “I am a proud and loyal customer and they have my business till my kids are ordering a family meal at KFC on the day of my funeral, god bless America”

Interesting. Door Dash is offering the same service to their food delivery workforce to the cleaners, cleaners will now be able to log onto the Door Dash app and be hired by people who demand the service. Door Dash discourages tipping, but suggests you donate proceeds to charities located in The Israel and The Ukraine. Cleaners will receive a flat rate wage of 3 dollars per hour of service.