Or do you prefer other adjectives? Do you consider it to be insulting or do you take it for a compliment if it was meant as one? (Assume an amenable relationship between the two people, not a random stranger or creeper)
Depends on context. "Cute" can be infantalizing and condescending, or not, or somewhere in between. In general, any blanket statements about relationships comes down to context.
As a male approaching middle-age this thread is confirming a lot of my suspicions that I never really had a firm understanding of. -Commenting on someone else's aesthetic appeal in relation to oneself seems to be an often questionable practice, especially if it's not someone one knows well.
So what I’m gleaming from this, all other things being equal:
- objects (clothes, accessories): okay
- the person themselve: not so much
Two of the comments so far mention "cute" as response to clothes/aesthetics. Just two.
Don't make blanket statements for interacting with women (or people in general) based on two internet comments. Please. Two comments.
The word you're looking for is 'gleaning'; 'gleaming' is more like 'shiny'.
For me, if anything, it depends on intentions. Most often though I'm just told I'm attention-seeking as opposed to cute, even with things like my clothing which consists of the same few things in circulation.
It's only really fine if someone calls me an appearance-based compliment if they're my partner or a woman that I'm close to.
Yes because I am cute. Actually. That’s my aesthetic.
Edit: I see a lot of people calling it infantilizing, but it’s my personality. And I’m older than other people on here have said they are.
If you want to say you like how I look compliment one of the grooming, fashion, or accessory choices, and I'll get the hint.
Hell, compliment my muscles. Literally just compliment anything I have agency over.
not by women. i'd just as soon a man never feel the need to comment on my appearance
In the context you've given, sure! I like it but I have trouble believing people when they say it.
Male here. There are many contexts. If I was still in high school, and a coach says "Don't be cute with me", I would take it as a compliment. It would mean I was doing a good job pissing him off.
really depends on the context. if i'm showing off my cosplay, no. If I'm receiving an award and posing for the camera -- yeah my looks aren't relevant.
I think ‘cute’ has developed a second meaning that is more in line with ‘stylish, aesthetically pleasing, clever’ than the ‘infant baby child/object’ sense of the word but I don’t know how to explain the difference. Probably the person’s other actions and intent and tone. Is someone being condescending in general, trying to frame someone as less than? Or is their body language/conversation style more geared toward a genuine expression of ‘i think you’re cool and like the way you look/your outfit or idea is nice’. I’m short and I get both - there is a subtle but very unmistakable difference between good cute and condescending cute. I feel the same way about ‘adorable’. The condescending usage of cute in my personal experience comes most often from women.
