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I strongly recommend voice lessons. Even if you are interested in just rapping, it's better if you can sing hooks well. working with a professional voice teacher isn't just about learning technique, it's also about learning how to be a performer. being accountable to another person to practice and share weekly/monthly progress will provide structure for your growth, and will definitely build self-efficacy. A good voice teacher will help you discover your voices unique possibilities for self-expression, and help you love your instrument
edit: try to get a recommendation from someone for a teacher. just like personal trainers, some are in the game for their own ego and benefit, and can be bullies or use guruism (i.e. "only I have all the answers, other voice teachers don't know what they're talking about") to build a cult of personality around their voice studio. Seek out wholesome teachers who aren't interested in fostering an economically and emotionally co-dependent working relationship
Are there any YouTube tutorials for people who don’t want to shell out for 1-on-1 lessons?
I'm not knowledgeable about youtube voice tutorials. I like Jeanie Lovetri and her approach, called "somatic voicework" and there seem to be lots of videos in that area. Another big pop vocal method is SLS, or speech level singing. Or you could just search for R&B vocal exercises or something.
But working off of youtube is like trying to learn any complex motor skill like golf, tennis, or surgery from videos. No one has perfect proprioception and self-awareness of our weird quirks and technical shortcomings. A trained human being can point them out to you 1000x faster than you can ever figure it out on your own. And again, learning to sing is a process of self-discovery and emotional growth. It's like trying to use youtube instead of talking to a therapist. You can definitely make progress, but I'd strongly consider looking for a qualified teacher if it is something important to your life and growth as a person. You deserve it.
And of course I know there are economic barriers. Life under late capitalism blows. I hope we can one day publicly fund all kinds of teaching beyond just formal education so that we all can flourish.
Try rapping in front of someone. Once you can do it comfortably do it in front of one person, the anxiety starts to wear off. I would also look into strategies of how to get over public speaking because the techniques should be analogous
Do this. With any music performance stuff do not be afraid to share with someone who you think would be receptive and make you more comfortable. Even better try find someone who is like that and would also want to engage and collaborate with what you're doing or has already been doing it themselves. It's all about practice and growth. I remember when I first played guitar with a buddy and I was so worried I'd suck and get judged. Of course I did suck cause everyone does at first. But if you find someone who is already doing it, they've also sucked before and, if you're a good judge of character, will be compassionate and constructive. Then each time you do it, it becomes more and more natural and automatic. I personally hold that view for any creative endeavor - failure and feedback are key, not brilliance
soundcloud rappers do tons of drugs, maybe that is an option