I'm going to find a professional out there in my area who can listen to all my concerns about stuff like diagnosing/dealing with AuDHD, talking about dealing with family stuff, and just my general desire to be a better person/communicate better. I don't think I can just indefinitely keep my problems inside the way I've been doing.
my version of this was that my therapist was actually p. decent but i had to take a break because i stopped doing the work and then after like a year of not benefiting from therapy at all i better understood what i needed immediate help with and then was more motivated to do the work the second time