With my first day with real energy in awhile being coupled with two temper meltdowns, (theres been a recent med change I should mention, but every one we have seems to just vacciltate between these two states). I feel like Im just... Im either a destructive ragebeast OR a useless sleepy flop who cant do literally anything.
I really dont want to live. I really dont want t fucking live. I'm so tired of this constant fucking struggle. I cant just have a good fucking day. I'll never accomplish anything and Ill keep hurting people and i just. Im so fucking exuasted (not literally because i still have energy, just tired of this gbullshit)
Thank you for saying that I'm one of your favorite posters. Felt a little alone today as well.
I'm on ADHD stuff rn too. I think I need it but maybe ive been barking up the wrtong tree all this time and I actually need to drop it who knows. Switching off Adderall to another one did help with my temper a fair bit but, hmm.
Can you talk to your doctor about the adverse effects on your mood? They might be able to tweek the dose or something. Sounds like it might be a common symptom if we both had the same problem, which means it might be more likely that a solution has been looked into.
On a more selfish note, If you do find a solution with your doctor to ADHD meds causing anger, please let me know as this problem is why I don't medicate.
I'm going to look into it. Ive sent my psych nurse a few emails.
I hope that route works out well, but even if it doesn't I hope you continue to try