I have always been curious about this. Did you get them to use other services or did they stubbornly refuse and you just accepted it? I am talking using Chrome, using Windows, using social media like Tiktok or Facebook or Instagram, etc. Bonus points if you have kids because that is even more work in the privacy realm

  • Ilandar@aussie.zone
    ·
    1 year ago

    It's a bigger sacrifice for her to come to my side on these issues, or even just meet me in the middle, then it is for me to do the opposite. Also, at the beginning of our relationship I was nowhere near as privacy-conscious as I am now, so I feel it is very unfair for me to turn around years into a relationship and start making demands of the other person. At the same time, she is respectful of my individual choices and doesn't mock them even though she doesn't see the value in them herself (which is the same for many aspects of our lives). We come from significantly different backgrounds and have very different perspectives on a whole range of things (politics, religion, lifestyle, etc), but we both see beyond those superficial differences to the person at the core. That's what we fell in love with, not all the other stuff which we are repeatedly told is so very important in our increasingly polarised society.

    • starlord@lemm.ee
      ·
      1 year ago

      Please detail the arcane wizardry which allowed you to achieve the respectful of your choices part you described, because it is the only way your story differs from my own situation.

      • Ilandar@aussie.zone
        ·
        1 year ago

        It's hard to say why we are like that with each other. Sometimes I think the fact that we faced so many unusual and difficult challenges early on in our relationship has made us less susceptible to these relatively normal problems that every couple experiences. Even the first few months (which are carefree for most couples) were filled with big commitments and sacrifices for us, so compared to that stuff everything else is so minor that it barely registers as an issue. Also, I think she is an unusually kind person and I am an unusually laid-back person and that is a combination that rarely leads to conflict.

        I'm sorry I can't be more helpful, but it's not really something we actively worked at. Are you saying that you and your partner are also from opposite worlds but haven't found a way to reconcile some of your differences?

        • starlord@lemm.ee
          ·
          1 year ago

          Yes, I think that's fairly accurate.

          It's really that, while I've respected her choice to not participate in any of the practices/protocols I've recommended, she doesn't see my own involvement in them as anything more than a waste of time. Even more so, she's said she worries about the way it might change me into a paranoid person (conspiracy theorist).

          Which feels a little disrespectful of the beliefs I've chosen. Like being told you're worshipping the wrong god, by your partner.