warning: discussion of South Park and animal sexual abuse.

South Park Season 2, episode 4 - Chickenlover.

This episode explains US policy, both foreign and domestic. The brief synopsis of the episode is that an eccentric children's reading bus (it's a mini library built into a school bus) driver pulls into town to promote reading and literacy. The kids check out the books and such and carry on. However, there's a commotion in town that the towns only police officer, Officer Barbrady, is dispatched to assess. He arrives on the scene of a clearly distressed hen and the local farmer explains that the chicken has been fucked. Local onlookers gasp and people ask who would do such a thing. A note was left by the perpetrator for Officer Barbrady to give him a clue. Barbrady however, only sees an incoherent missmash of letters and nervously disperses the crowd. To try to decode the message, he consults with the reading bus guy, who discovers that the officer is actually illiterate!

Later, another chicken is fucked, and another note is left. Barbrady continues to consult with his new tutor to solve the case of the serial chicken fucker, and learns to read as he goes. More chickens, more notes, repeat. Until the final clue reveals that the eccentric bus driver is the one fucking the chickens all along!! And with a crowd present for the confrontation and arrest, the reading bus guy explains "I had to fuck chickens to get you to read!!"

Clearly, the freak just wanted to fuck chickens, and since he knows this is some sick shit, be builds up an elaborate justification. This is a direct analog to US political problem solving.

If a small Latin American country wants freedom and democracy, let's bomb the shit out of them to bring them democracy.

If Jonny Q. Public living in poverty wants a good meal for him and his family, better cut food stamps so he'll get a job to feed his family!

I have to commit genocide to get you to vote for democracy!

We have to ethnically cleanse Gaza to get rid of Hamas!

So yeah, that's my half baked theory on how we're all ruled by a bunch of chicken fuckers. Not sure if the creators intended for there to be any moral of the story to be honest, I kinda just got the vibe that they wanted to write an episode about fucking chickens...

Any way, see where you can spot when politicians are using this logic, or how our news media spins US imperialism. Next time you see it, you might just mutter "bunch of goddamn chicken fuckers".