• roux [he/him, they/them]
    ·
    2 days ago

    Trying to find the energy to deal with my partner's family's 3 day long Christmas bullshit. The kids get to hang out with their cousins that they only get to see like twice a year so that's cool at least.

    We probably also spent a bit too much on gifts this year after I had an autistic shutdown due to work and it rolled into a fight about buying gifts. I've tried to tell my wife about my views on buying frivolous gifts for family that they don't want or need and how I'd just rather buy myself something small or whatever, but she's a "gifts as a love language" person and so we don't quite jive well on that. An online autistic friend actually has the same feelings about gifts as me and he explained it to her from his perspective and I guess how he explained it made it click for her. It's funny because I've been trying to explain it for 13 years lol.

    • CleverOleg [he/him]
      ·
      15 minutes ago

      I am not autistic but I can very much relate to this. I am at the point that I am trying to remove more material objects from my life than I am trying to add, and getting any gifts that aren’t consumable is a direct hindrance to that. Sadly I do find attitudes like ours to be rare and the “gifts as love language” to be far more common.

      And with my kids, they have far more toys than they could ever play with. Even my wife agrees and we try to let others know not to get them any gifts but it happens anyway.