For me a lot of the despair is actually grief, sadness and also legitimate anger at how the generations past have let it come to this. Just last night before bed this incredible very abnormal snowfall started where I live and I felt that deep grief and anger. The feeling of powerlesness and inability to change this is tied to it. It's the struggle under the dictatorship of the few that you feel in your gut.

And the backdrop to that is the deep love and affection I feel for my kid, the way I desperarely want the world to be better for him and for all kids and all people. It's the disappoinment and anger I often feel towards people like my own parents who lived in a very "fuck you got mine" way and then resorted to apathy and nihilims and saying shit like "it's the job of the next generations to save us". I get why they are like this, but I refuse to accept it. They should have known better, there is always a choice to do better.

These boomers and liberty hippies have passed on this vibe of how history has ended and now we are all to just slowly learn to accept suffering and decline. It's a part of the same capitalist crap that told budding Marx readers like me that I am an utopian idealist and how stuff like that would never work "in the real world". Everything and everyone around us is programmed to dooming like this and that is why nothing ever changes. And it's no wonder it feels desperate sometimes, we are told constantly that it is. The most popular scifi is dystopian, we are fed stories with bad endings day in and day out.

Take away peoples hope, you take away a lot of what makes us human. The ruling class gets this imo.

Solidarity.