but something laxer like a conservative grandma complaining about gay people on her personal facebook and things like that, i wouldn't think she deserves to go to jail

But hate and hate speech always start small like the conservative grandma. That's why you have to put the "fear of god" in them for even the smallest infractions. If they know they'll get "wished into a cornfield" for just saying "I hate...", then curbing hate speech becomes more effective.