Warning: r slurs in the follow ups in the thread.
https://twitter.com/puella_meiberu/status/1708621428327657816
my reactions are as follows: Even if thats true, which it isnt for every autistic person, the reality is right now is that jobs dont have accomodations for neurdivergent thinking so its irrelevant to say that. Like we can push for and advocate for more inclusive workplaces, but its not the reality autsitic people are dealing with rn.
Especially since like, there are jobs that autistic people can do well but most of them are not "entry level" jobs that anyone can get without qualifications. Retail and food service jobs are near impossible for most autistic people and those are the jobs you can get easy. Manual labor jobs arent much better. I've worked at an after school program but I only lasted as long as I did because my original boss let me get away with not "running activities" the reality is that even if you're good with kids like me most jobs with kids have expectaitons that arent just "being good with kids" that arent good for autistic people. Idk about office stuff.
It reminds me of my ex-friend who claimed to be communist but had a lot of reactionairy attitudes. He always told me that if I ever called him on something and told him it was ableist he would take it seriously, and even called out others when they treated me abliestly. But one day when he posted on his Twitter shitting on Spoon Theory I texted him to call him on that and he started ranting all this shit about how you can "always push through" and talking about how his manual labor job cured his depression (and acting like that will be the case for everyone if they just push, and that manual labor is a cure all) and then started accusing me of wasting my life and making excuses and using my disability as a criticism shield. We no longer talk much lol.
The quote in the tweet is a distinction without a difference, for one.
It's a bit like telling a permanent wheelchair user that they're not too disabled to get out and about but if there are no accessible public transport services and they can't use a car then, yeah, they are too disabled to get out and about.
The cause of the disability can be debated but the reality of the disability doesn't care one bit for how you make that distinction, as you have already argued.
Secondly, autism is pretty well known for being a spectrum and you can't universalise the experience of autism just because Ellie in IT is autistic and she copes just fine (Does she really though? Is she so burnt out that she has zero social contact outside of work? Is the rest of her life a complete disaster? Does she literally spend each weekend stuck in bed as she tries to recuperate enough for the coming work week? You can't know what other people are going through unless you really know them.)
Third, autistic people have a high rate of catatonic episodes compared to most other populations. If you're autistic and you experience catatonia then, unless your job is a one-in-a-million with regards to accommodations, you're either going to be unemployable or you're going to bounce from job to job as your resume looks increasingly poor and you lose references and you dig yourself deeper and deeper into burnout.
As for your friend who doesn't believe in spoon theory that's simply an expression of their own personal experience being universalised onto everyone. If you've ever experienced burnout or you've been through it yourself then it's pretty obvious that you can push through but that it comes at a high cost and ultimately, at some point, you won't be able to continue pushing through.
I experience pretty severe bouts of executive dysfunction (hooray for being autistic and ADHD, I guess?) and there's a point where I get to that I just have to drop out of activities and recuperate. I can push through but I'll start losing possessions like my cards, my wallet, my keys, and it can even get so bad that I struggle with basic directions and following simple instructions and I'll forget to do things like locking things up, taking important things with me, or turning the oven or the stove off.
Can I push through? Of course.
Do the consequences of pushing through far outweigh the minimal benefits I might get from pushing through? Absolutely.
Just because you can do something doesn't mean that it's healthy, sustainable, positive, or that you should do it (and especially not on a regular basis.)
Can you go out drinking all night and then work the next day? Sure!
Can you do that every day of the week? Maybe...
Are you going to keep your job if you do that for longer than a week? Probably not.
I'd love to hear what the spoon theory-skeptic would have to say about "pushing through" on a week-long bender while trying to hold down a job. But that would probably come off as picking a fight so I doubt it would be worth the discussion.
neoliberal Japanese culture lol
The shit I see from Korean work culture (from an outsider perspective so grain of salt) is dreadful, going to drink shots of liquor with your boss after work sounds like torture to me.
No one really gave me shit for skipping after work when it comes up from time to time so small blessings
Great comment thanks! And yeah im never bringing up the topic with him again after the abuse he threw at me last time i did lol.
I've self diagnosed given some family history of autism and a bit of anecdotal symptoms I identify with. Similar story with ADHD. I have a 'formal' ADHD diagnosis now as an adult but have second guessed the self diagnosis of autism for a while due to my ability to function...alright...in the world but damn if your descriptions don't describe most of my adult life after not being able to coast by as 'the smart kid'.
Currently I'm the midst of burning out hard with many financial responsibilities preventing me from just walking away (would even have to pay my job back some....), and this offers some comfort knowing I'm not a complete fuck up for losing another pair of wireless headphones and constantly misreading emails at work and problems on tests at school (oh yeah I'm a full time student too, it's awful, I hate every minute of it)
Kind of just assumed I was an emotionally detached person, especially when experiencing stress in my personal life like fights with loved ones, so again, thanks for making me feel less crazy. Fearing the continuously shrinking lengths of time I can stick around at a job for on my resume too. At least I'm financially obligated to stick around at this one, I'm sure I'll have no negative consequences /s
I hate this living in a world like this
You aren't a fuck up.
Unsolicited advice, but I'd recommend making the time to do an audit of your life and responsibilities. See if there are any opportunities where you can cut back on the demands you have on yourself. Think about accommodations that you can afford for yourself and what you might be able to request from study and work. The more you persevere through burnout, the deeper the burnout gets and the longer it takes to recover.
An ounce of prevention is absolutely worth a pound of cure in this situation.
It's much easier said than done but try to find a job that you are capable of doing at 50-75% capacity, whether that's psychological and emotional demand or required effort (or similar). If you can do the job at half capacity then you can probably stick at the job through the low points and come out the other end just fine. Be careful about taking on a job where you will be pushed to your limits because if you neeed to reduce your demands to prevent burnout then this means you will need to find areas in your personal life to cut back on demands which often leads to relationship breakdown, social isolation, loss of hobbies and interests, and a general erosion of the things that keep you happy and contribute to your overall wellbeing.
Worst case scenario in this situation is that you can find yourself trapped in a spiral of depression which will cause you to increasingly disengage from the things in your personal life that keep you well while you find yourself putting in extra effort at work to maintain the same level of productivity. No bueno.
On a different note, I am planning to make a post about autistic catatonia here soon because it really isn't talked about very much and it can have a significant impact on autistic people's lives. There are ways of treating and preventing it and the knowledge on this stuff is not widespread. I just need to catch myself on a better day than I've recently been having before I do it because I want to do the topic justice. Keep a lookout for when that post goes up!
Thanks for the support, it means a lot
You can forgive yourself here, it's just the ADHD tax