Yeah I've had "wtf am I even doing here" moments at work while kids are in school/day care. It's crucial that we're involved in their lives, unless you have a great network of people who can impart those same values.

Like I said I totally relate to what you're feeling though. I'll be playing with the kids and thinking about shit and they'll notice I'm not being my usual self and I hate it. The parenting comm doesn't have a ton of posts but might be a good place to check out or post in.