I've only ever heard other queer people (and almost always men) say the f slur in extremely queer spaces where it's very understood what's happening. Those same people wouldn't dare outside of those spaces. I think that's kind of okay. I don't think the other kind of people saying it think it's okay because they're hanging out in queer spaces. I think they're saying it because they know what it means and they're full of prejudice.

I also think it's funny that queer was that way when I was growing up. Now I see it used properly on work emails. Language grows and changes. It's quite possible that someday the f slur will someday be reclaimed enough that it's okay to say in broader contexts.