I am in my postcovid phase again. This is the third or fourth time and every time I've lost more of my overall health. The first time was the worst and longest, ended up in the hospital that time. After the Omicron one I developed plantar fasciitis and pains so bad that my running and jumping has ended for good. There's been so many weird issues, even teeth breaking. Also flared up my sciatica that has been fine for a decade or more.
But the thing that disables me the most is the nausea and gagging, the GI stuff and POTS I get from it. And it's back again. This time no bad coughing and thankfully not too much mental stuff, but oh man the heart/GI symptoms suck! I spend months gagging on the side of the road when leaving for work after I get it every damn time. It is always worse in the morning and I was just rid of it when I got infected again by my "living like it's 2019" family, for the second time within a year.
I am four weeks in this time and I have a high pounding heartrate after eating and on standing up, some nights I wake up to my heart pounding. Also very hightened stress response, feels like I am just wired all the time. This has happened to me every time, the first time it even gave me the worst panic attacks ever that came fully out of nowhere, it was wild and felt 100% physical.
Oh and interesting new pain stuff along with the foot and joint pains: Yesterday I did a bit of foam rolling to my back and neck to see if it might help with the nausea ans stress. I have done this for years with no issue. Today I feel like someone rolled over my spine with a truck. It's like my entire back is inflamed.
This post covid inflammation is hell. I wonder if I'll still make it, if my heart will.
Just a bit of rant, I am just scared and tired of this. My life is pretty good atm otherwise, I finally would have steady work and income after decades of poverty, I even like my work. Life is more secure and I am just happpier because I know I am audh now and have gotten rid of a lot of brainworms. But this virus feels like it will end me and it feels like there is nothing whatsoever I can do to truly prevent this. We are and have been very cautious, but extended family keeps bringing it to us or we are forced to get it from work/studies. I am not sure my body can keep rolling this dice even once anymore. And we can't even get boosters here, they just aren't available to us.
My partner who was high risk to begin with has developed diabetes after the infection we got for Christmas 2023. And after this time he is just very very brain foggy and has been irritable, not at all himself. I don't know what I'd do if I lost him to this.
Dreaming of Fauci/Birx/Wolensky etc rotting in the Hague keeps me going sometimes
The aches, inflammation, irritability, brain fog, racing heart and lightheadedness from standing up after crouching all track with me and I chipped a tooth too, no clue if that's related but at this point it wouldn't surprise me.
Sleep problems have been the worst for me. It takes me forever to get comfortable now and even longer to fall asleep no matter how exhausted I am. I wake up much easier from noises, and sometimes get random racing pulse lying totally still when I'm trying to fall asleep. I don't know what to make of that or what can be done to improve it and I'll live the rest of my life being fucking furious at every piece of shit that botched the covid response and decimated the healthcare sector and permanently damaged public trust or the very notion of a societal responsibility to prevent communicable disease from spreading. It's "back to normal" forever now, and I hope everyone in the current, next and previous admins all fucking die of covid like they deserve to.
Fauci got West Nile Virus and it still didn't kill him. I'd like to think that rest of his existence is just gonna be suffering all the worse shit rather than dying.
I want a truth and reconciliation commission, but realistically Fauci getting the Jair curse and getting a comical chain of ailments and getting attacked by animals would be nice
Call it a cope but at this point yeah if these people aren’t gonna die then I’m glad they will live to suffer continually worse and worse things.
Oh fuck I am sorry, I had the sleep problems and spent months with horrible bedtime anxiety, but thankfully they aren't bad this time. Really hope it eases for you.
I agree, the covid "experts" all deserve the wall. Here in the nordic countries they really revealed the eugenist roots of their public health policy with covid. I knew it was bad because I know what Finnish public health historically did to pathologize Karelian folks responses to poverty and oppression, but oh my god they didn't even try to hide the same ideologies today. Every day a talking head was on the news reassuring the normos not to worry because covid only kills those already weak/frail. Disgusting.
Scratch a liberal's treat supply and a eugenicist bleeds, it's sickening. They let millions of people die so they could all go back to eating at Cracker Barrel and go see Glup Shitto: A Star War Story