• ksdhf@lemmygrad.ml
    ·
    1 year ago

    Based on the people I know who are like this (both male, female, heterosexual and homosexual). They don't get out much and don't meet new people. Another big reason is having high expectations of others and not being able to compromise while at the same time having a lot of insecurities.

    If you are reading this and cannot get a date:

    1. Get out and meet people. If you are shy go somewhere outside of your area/town where no one knows you, that way if you embarass yourself you'll never see them again.
    2. Try to make more friends first, it will increase your social circle and boost your confidence.
    3. Don't be afraid to be cringe. It's your right as a human to be a little bit cringe as a treat.
    4. Still not sure where to meet people? Join a political activist group.
    5. Lighten up, be positive and have fun! People can tell when someone is stressed/miserable and no one wants to be around a bad vibe.
          • ksdhf@lemmygrad.ml
            ·
            1 year ago

            In what way would it make someone feel uncomfortable if you were to try and socialise with them (in a platonic way)?

            • rjs001@lemmygrad.ml
              ·
              1 year ago

              I misread what they wrote. In a platonic way it fine but under no circumstances should an org be someone’s personal dating site

      • cayde6ml@lemmygrad.ml
        ·
        1 year ago

        I don't think you should shy away from dating in political activism, but there are many obstacles and things to be aware of and shit, and yeah, don't close yourself off but don't treat it as a dating scene.

        • rjs001@lemmygrad.ml
          ·
          1 year ago

          I see no way in which that wouldn’t just make the whole thing more uncomfortable for people

          • cayde6ml@lemmygrad.ml
            ·
            1 year ago

            Lenin met his wife while organizing. And goodness forbid that people ever feel uncomfortable. Uncomfortable is part of life, though its different when people's safety could be at risk.

            • su25@lemmygrad.ml
              ·
              1 year ago

              sure, when people are in a relationship the main issue is just other people's discomfort, but i have found that the real problems lie in the breakup that happens. i have seen entire organizations crumble over a single nasty breakup because of the ensuing polarization that happens when that drama gets in the way of all the professionalism and organizing. for that reason, i've always found it bad practice and a little selfish to date within orgs.

            • rjs001@lemmygrad.ml
              ·
              edit-2
              1 year ago

              Obviously feeling uncomfortable for that is different than for organizing. The quickest way to be viewed as a fuck-up is to attempt to date within an organization (regardless if that is activism or work or something else)