Also history books will forever use term "Burgerize" after the fact.

  • BlueMagaChud [any]
    ·
    edit-2
    8 months ago

    "christian" pedophiles will rove around executing people who they suspect are trans but are just cis people who don't look like the people on tv shows, ostensibly to protect children from non-"christian" pedophiles

    • ZapataCadabra [he/him]
      hexagon
      ·
      8 months ago

      Good thing an armed Transguard will defend the few innocent cis people left.

    • NotErisma
      ·
      edit-2
      7 months ago

      deleted by creator

  • Maoo [none/use name]
    ·
    edit-2
    8 months ago

    After the 11th year of Texas refusing to allow payment of taxes to "the feds", complaining that it refuses to fund neoliberal "Commiefornia", the Secure Our System (SOS) Bill has been signed into federal law, providing vastly more autonomy for individual states over powers of taxation, economic regulation, and foreign policy. Civil Society organizations around the country decry the law as unconstitutional, but it never faces a serious legal challenge as the council of geriatrics in the Supreme Court is 7:2 members of a pseudohistorical "traditionalist" interpretation that has already seen several powers previously held by the federal government struck down. Capital controls are gone for most of the country and the unionists are synonymous with terrorists, assassinating cops and management on a regular basis (the flip-side is getting imprisoned or summarily executed by the cops).

    The system cracks to a breaking point when it is unable to resolve economic contradictions through the federalist system, which is the actual reason that major states are demanding autonomy (TX is a net receiver of funds at the time, their official excuse makes no sense). What is really desired is things like this:

    • The ability to regulate currency so as to regulate or displace the burgeoning black market.

    • The right to re-create debtor prisons and official forced labor.

    • The right to indefinite declarations of martial law and the corresponding suspension of labor rights.

    • The ability to selectively trade with other countries, choosing alignments with perceived advantage. California wants integration with the Pacific Rim despite federal protectionist policies against it and Texas wants to do its own naked attempts at imperialism focused on controlling the entire Gulf of Mexico, Mexico itself, the Caribbean, and West Africa. CA and TX fight over influence over MX and MX recognizes that it's actually stronger than both of them combined, economically, but would like to avoid getting nuked by desperate kkkrackers.

    • Rights to water and other resource access, including trade. Landlocked / non-border states demand pathways to ports and trade that becomes controlled by the rest of the states. Geography dictates that coastal states acquire vassal inland states, creating internal conflicts that cannot be resolved except by violence.

    War will inevitably break out over economic interests and then cultural framings as the lines get drawn in the sand. Bad things happen. Country was already de facto balkanized, it just becomes official once there are winners and losers.

    Cyber Xi Jinping sips a glass of wine from the 472nd floor of a skyscraper in techno-Chongqing.

  • DamarcusArt@lemmygrad.ml
    ·
    8 months ago

    President Kanye West and Vice President Elon Musk get into a street race after the last in a long line of many heated arguments and die in a car crash. This causes a succession crisis in the US federal government, with various states refusing to accept the new situation. A formerly young man from Wisconsin leads a people's revolution, uniting the entire great lakes region under a socialist banner.

  • BodyBySisyphus [he/him]
    ·
    8 months ago

    Military coup followed by massive civil war as various factions within the military arise and start fighting each other. Balkanization starts once national military is no longer able to prevent governors from appointing themselves petty warlords with the support of national guard/deserter militias. Internal civil wars start between breakaway counties and the state governments in Oregon, Washington, California, New York, and Pennsylvania. Texas becomes one of those whirling cartoon fight clouds. Everything abruptly reaches a detente once the national high fructose corn syrup reserves are irreparably damaged, leading to a critical disruption in the coca-cola supply.

  • HexbearGPT [comrade/them]
    ·
    8 months ago

    Toy for tat terrorist attacks by armed paramilitary groups on state governments between red states and blue states. Every move the federal government makes only further inflame both sides as they both claim corruption of the federal system by the other side. Then governors start using their own state police or national guard units to try and go into opposing states and “catch the terrorists” or “enforce the rule of law” which leads to coalitions of states forming until the battle lines are drawn, and then the federal military defecting to one side or the other. Then 1,000 years of Hatfield vs McCoy Civil war violence breaks out creating a hell on earth as a form of cosmic karma for the suffering the US empire caused globally for the past 500 years.

  • EmmaGoldman [she/her, comrade/them]M
    ·
    edit-2
    8 months ago

    The year was 1986

    He was a teenager like any other

    Dreaming of his heroes and in love with a girl

    But on a thunderous night along a ragged coast

    A mysterious red car came to him

    Its power lighting his eyes blood-red

    In a flash all was lost in the hellfire of twisted metal

    When our hero emerged from the burning wreckage

    He and the car had become one, their souls spliced forever

    Leaving him to wander the night alone

    Invisible to everyone but her.


    Comrade Brett Matthews and his girlfriend Pattie will destroy the US when the Dark Rider is revealed to be none other than... The President!