been here like 5 months now and i still feel socially isolated. idk if im off putting or something with autdhd but i cant remember how to make friends. i've talked to people but i really struggle with small talk and i just end up doing my work in silence because it's just simpler
idk if this is rant or ask for advice but im sad about it
Suggest coffee/lunch. Easy openers: weekend plans what did you do last weekend, bitch about the weather/traffic/real estate prices. Let people talk, listen and ask them to elaborate.
If you want to make real friends at work, pay attention to people and their personal lives. Example: my coworker called out sick because his partner got covid so in a few days I followed up to see how they were doing. That stuff goes a long way and it's just a text message.
People love talking about themselves. Try to be interested in the lives of other people. How do you strike up a conversation? Ask them a weird question, there's lots of good ones on asklemmy. If you could swap lives with any fictional character what would it be? If you could shoot anything out of the tips of your fingers what would it be? What is a rational fear you have? If it's fun to you it'll probably be fun for others too.
A little philosophical here, but you're usually better at doing things when you don't care if you succeed. Try to make friends because you should try to make friends, not because you need friends. Talk to people because conversation is great, not because it's the path you must follow for friendship.
How do you know when it's okay to share stuff about yourself? Not a fucking clue buddy. I think most people out there are actually pretty bad at conversation too, so have patience with them.
Not sure if this has been helpful. I read a book once, Platonic by Marissa G. Franco. It's helped me understand friendship better.
Idk. Work isn't the place for "friends" for me. I spend my idle time here and then get docked on my reviews for "not having a good enough attitude" or "being on your device too much" despite admitting I complete my tasks adequately.
not so much friends but it would be nice to talk to people about something that isn't work
Mhm I've found work it's more acquaintances sadly, and similarly getting shit for tone etc, basic ableism from people too
Yeah idk either, I’ve been at my job almost 5 years and most of my work friends left in the last year or 2 and now I also feel very isolated
I get this everywhere, I've no friends at all bar my wife, it can suck.. I've been through a lot and have issues with people too, lots of trauma so it's difficult to open up too. I also can shut down and go non verbal. I've started to try again but it's hard trying to stay positive all the time.
I hope someone reaches out an olive branch.
I see some solid advice in here already, good luck
