Have about 66 minutes free waiting in line at the celestial DMV. Fire away.

    • LiterallySatan [none/use name]
      hexagon
      ·
      edit-2
      3 years ago

      I mix it up, but off the top of my head:

      Morning:

      • Servants make civet coffee. I yell at them until they burn it and then I pour some on them.
      • Feast on the carved remnants of gluttons
      • Shoot up black tar heroin.
      • Smoke
      • Read the Economist
      • Take a heroin and coffee shit on a random fascist (it's a lottery)

      Afternoon:

      • Torture the damned of my choice
      • Spit on Thatcher
      • Smoke
      • Skin someone alive from bottom to top and then rend what's left like an old rotisserie chicken -- Favorites for this: Jerry Falwell or J Edgar Hoover (they both plead to a god who cannot hear them)
      • 15 minute sync with one of the multiple deities I work with.
      • Hot yoga

      Evening:

      • Drink Jäger and Fireball straight from the bottle.
      • Force every American President to dance for me in one big chorus line. I pick them off one at a time with a ballista.
      • I eat one of the survivors alive and make the rest watch.
      • Smoke
      • Review infernal contracts
      • Listen to black metal, hang with Dio (he's an honored guest)
      • Indulge my sweet tooth
      • Chug a gallon of ladnum
      • Sleep