Humans haven't invented a new pantheistic religion for like, what, 3000 years? Well, I think that's a load of bullshit. We need to create a new one with some rad new gods.
The god I'm creating is called Blatphleuvious and they're a trickster god that is responsible for all the mischief animals do that annoys humans, like your dog farting in the car or a pigeon pooping on your head. Blatphleuvious makes that shit happen because he thinks it's hilarious and also to remind us that others aren't ours to control.
He has the shaggy head of a wild boar, and the body of a man wearing the clothes of an old babushka.
Please give me more ideas for gods. I demand it.
I haven't got a name for it, but like some divine trickster that moves objects slightly when you aren't looking so that you bump into things and stub your toes. This entity does this to punish a perceived hubris in man. Its holy day is the 12 of November and you light a candle in its honour so to plead that it doesn't use the shortening of days to move more of your sharp things to shin height.
That fucker made me knock my elbow on my letterbox today :angery:
Pretty close to Anoia from Discworld if you toss in "things that getting stuck in drawers"
I'd completely forgot that bumping into things was also within Anoia's godly sphere. It's been years since I've read any Discworld books and was trying to aim for the kind of God the heroes dress as during the end of the last hero.
I think it was but haven't read in a long time